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Influence is an art

Today, we’re talking about influence, and how you can’t do it if you don’t know yourself.

Tool #2: It’s not about them (aka: Own your shit)

Most of the emotional pain I’ve been through in my life comes from other people. Or rather, my REACTION to other people.

I used to tell myself things like:

“Why can’t he just get it?”
“She doesn’t understand me.”
“Wow, that guy was an ass.”

Here’s the thing, though…

Wishing other people were different is a sign of emotional immaturity on OUR part.

Instead of hoping they understand you, or constantly being triggered by someone else’s behavior, work on your own emotional resilience.

Look inward and ask yourself why you are allowing your emotions to be controlled by other people.

True mastery is high emotional intelligence – a harbinger of the modern leader, by the way.

How to know if you are using this tool:

  • How often do you get frustrated or angry with a client, or friend, or someone you see online?
  • Why do you get frustrated or angry?
  • How often do you complain about how someone else is behaving?
  • How confident do you feel in your ability to lead and influence, despite how people may or may not behave?

How to implement this tool:

  • If you are constantly triggered by what’s going on around you, you’re weak-minded. It’s time to do some internal work on how you became so vulnerable to what other people think, say or do.
  • Complaining about how others behave is a sign we are losing our focus and abdicating responsibility. We are believing, in those moments, that somehow those people are responsible for our feelings. Which is bullshit. No one can make you feel anything. Only you can do that.
  • Leading and influencing require high emotional intelligence. So, if you’re someone who loses her shit when things don’t turn out, or when someone replies with snark, that means you are leaving your rational mind and becoming emotional. The moment you become emotional, you lose your seat of power. Logic is gone and we begin reacting (not choosing thoughtful, intelligent responses). And no one can lead from a reactionary place.

True leadership and Influence is complicated and fluid.

You’ve got to know yourself if you want to attract raving fans and guide them to better lives.

You have to take responsibility for your own emotions and own your shit before anyone will buy into your message and you as a leader. Which is why influence is an art.

If you haven’t yet, be sure to join my private Facebook community, Tune In. Turn On., where I am LIVE twice a week going in-depth on these tools.

– Becky

P.S. Implementing these tools requires persistence and consistency. Building a bulletproof mindset, and staking your claim in your industry, requires time and effort. If you know what you’re doing isn’t working, apply for a seat in my new 90-program, Game-Changer. 

Seats are limited and the time is now.

It’s time to lead (for real)

Today marks the start of a 30-day series I created to help you become the industry leader and dominant force you say you want to be.

This is the #30daystorise series – a 30-day opportunity for you to actually walk your talk, rise up and claim the life and business you say you want.

For the next month, I’ll be sharing powerful tools to get your mind right, truly serve with heart and create an audience of raving fans.

The tips I am going to share are what I use every day to continuously grow, scale and serve millions (and make millions too).

None of what I will talk about includes systems, tactics or cookie-cutter BS.

In fact, I don’t want you to use my strategies. The whole point of being your own boss is doing things your way.

A few things to note:

  • There are no small moves here.
  • Nothing I share is optional.
  • It is what you must choose to do for yourself if you are going to be a true leader.
  • And you may want to create a folder in your inbox just for the gems I am about to drop.
  • If you haven’t yet, join my private Facebook community, Tune In. Turn On., where I will be LIVE to go in-depth with everything I’m sharing in the series.

Today, we start at square one: Environment is everything.

Tool #1: Ditch Negative Influences

Warren Buffett once told a 14-year-old what I consider to be the single best piece of advice on how to be successful:

“It’s better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates 
whose behavior is better than yours and you’ll drift in that direction.”

The people you surround yourself with are either helping you or hurting you. There is no in between.

Be ruthless about who and what gets your time and energy.

Most people don’t go that far.

“But they’re family.”
“It’s just a movie with old friends.”
“I deserve to relax.”

And then you wonder why you lack the requisite energy, focus and motivation to get shit done.

The truth is you must guard your energy with your life. Treat your time like the precious commodity that it is. Get rid of anything and everything that is not helping you to grow.

How to know if you are using this tool:

  • Who do you follow on social media?
  • How much TV do you watch a day, and what type?
  • Who do you hang out with, and are they of a similar mindset?

How to implement this tool:

  • Delete everyone on social media that doesn’t add value to your life. Unfollow, block or delete.
  • Ditch your cable or satellite.
  • Stop spending time with friends just because they are friends. You can love them from a distance. Right now, it’s time to get busy.

These are just a handful of things you need to do – right now.

In order to get good at something, to master something, you need to take time for it. Time that will allow you to contribute to the world in the way you say you want. Resolve to stop wasting hours on things that will not matter years from now.

If you think the above is too extreme, you aren’t playing to win.

But if you are all in, and want to find out how to create a bulletproof mindset that leads to success, growth and the life you want, then stay tuned.

This month-long email and blog series is about undiluted reality, powerful strategies and next level accountability.

– Becky

P.S. If you haven’t yet, be sure to join my private Facebook community, Tune In. Turn On., where I will be going in-depth with everything I’m sharing in the series.