Tag Archive for: Rebecca T Dickson

What Coaches Get Wrong About Trauma (And How to Get It Right)

Let’s cut the bullshit: most coaches aren’t trauma-informed, even if they think they are. Just knowing trauma exists and hoping for the best isn’t enough.

Your clients deserve more. And if you’re serious about helping them, it’s time to get real about what trauma-informed coaching actually means.

First, let’s break down the difference between being trauma-aware and trauma-informed.

  • Trauma-aware: You know trauma exists. You might spot it in a client, and you avoid obvious mistakes like pushing too hard or minimizing their experience.
  • Trauma-informed: You know how to recognize trauma responses, support your clients in real time without causing harm, and protect your own energy in the process.

One is passive. The other is a skillset that changes how you coach on every level.

Trauma-informed coaching isn’t about fixing or diagnosing your clients. It’s about knowing how to hold space for what’s coming up – without making it worse for them or draining yourself.


Holding Space Without Soaking Up Your Client’s Energy

If you’ve ever left a session feeling completely wiped out – or worse, like you’re carrying your client’s emotions around for days – you’re not alone.

This happens because you haven’t been taught how to hold space without taking on someone else’s energy.

It’s not about caring less. It’s about grounding and releasing so you can stay fully present without burning out.

Here’s how:

  1. Ground yourself before every session. This doesn’t have to be complicated. Plant your feet on the floor. Take a deep breath. Picture your energy staying anchored and steady.
  2. Release what isn’t yours. I like to imagine shaking off everything that doesn’t belong to me, like dirt off my boots. It’s simple but powerful.

These little rituals can save you from the emotional hangover that comes from taking on too much. They’ll help you show up stronger for your clients without sacrificing yourself in the process.


Why Trauma-Informed Coaching Matters More Than Ever

Here’s the truth: Clients are craving deeper work. They’re no longer satisfied with surface-level mindset shifts or generic advice.

They want real transformation, and if you’re not trauma-informed, you’re missing an opportunity to meet them at that level.

That’s exactly why I created my Trauma-Informed Coaching Certification.

This isn’t just another coaching course full of theory and buzzwords. It’s a 10-week deep dive into practical tools you can use right away. You’ll learn how to recognize trauma in the moment, respond effectively, and protect your own energy while doing the work.

What you’ll walk away with:

  • Confidence in handling whatever comes up in a session without panicking or second-guessing yourself
  • Tools to help your clients regulate their nervous systems (even when they’re spinning out)
  • A deeper understanding of how trauma shows up in coaching and what to do about it

If you’ve been feeling like there’s something missing in your coaching, this is probably it. 

Trauma-informed work takes your practice from good to life-changing—for you and your clients.


What’s Next?

The coaching industry is changing fast. More clients are seeking trauma-informed coaches. And more coaches are realizing they need these tools to stay relevant and effective. If you’re ready to stop guessing and start coaching at a deeper level, this certification is your next step.

Click here to learn more and enroll.

Final Word

Being trauma-informed isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about knowing how to hold space, how to respond with compassion and clarity, and how to protect your own energy so you can keep doing this work without burning out.

If that resonates with you, it’s time to take the next step.

The next cohort begins Feb. 27. Join us.

POP QUIZ on trauma-informed coaching

Trauma-informed coaching is not just a trend—it’s a necessity in high demand.

Experts say, year over year since COVID, the need has increased 20% per 12 months with no end in sight.

That’s why I’m hosting a free workshop on Nov. 19, exploring what it means to be a trauma-informed coach. Check it out here.

*

Meantime, test your knowledge with these scenarios…

1: Sarah always insists on handling things alone and refuses help, even when she’s clearly struggling with her workload. Is this a trauma response or not? If yes, how do you support your client?

2: Mark finds it hard to trust his team and feels the need to double-check everyone’s work before approving it. His attention to detail is impeccable, but he ends up working late almost every day. Trauma response or not? If yes, how do you support your client?

3: Rachel tends to shut down in meetings when feedback is given, becoming quiet and withdrawn for the rest of the day. Her colleagues assume she’s just not interested in participating. What do you think—trauma response or not? If yes, how do you support your client?

Here are the answers:

Scenario 1: Sarah always insists on handling things alone and refuses help, even when she’s clearly struggling with her workload.

Answer: Trauma Response.

Explanation: Sarah’s insistence on doing everything alone may be rooted in a survival response from past experiences where she couldn’t rely on others. Trauma can lead people to develop a “hyper-independence” as a way to feel safe, often arising from situations where they had to depend only on themselves.

How do we handle it?

Acknowledge and Validate: Start by recognizing her perspective without judgment. “It sounds like handling things on your own feels important to you. That makes sense if it’s worked for you in the past.”

Gently Explore the Root Cause: Ask questions to help her reflect on why she prefers working alone. “Have there been times when relying on others didn’t feel safe or didn’t work out as you hoped?”

Reframe Support: Position help as a tool for achieving her goals, not a weakness. “What if accepting support could give you more time or energy for the parts of your work you enjoy most?”


Scenario 2: Mark finds it hard to trust his team and feels the need to double-check everyone’s work before approving it.

Answer: Trauma Response.

Explanation: Mark’s behavior suggests a need for control, often a response to past experiences where things felt chaotic or unpredictable. Trauma can make people feel safer when they control every detail, and lack of trust in others’ work could be a way of managing underlying anxiety.

How do we handle it?

Scenario 2: Mark finds it hard to trust his team and feels the need to double-check everyone’s work before approving it.

Create a Safe Space: Reassure him that his feelings are valid. “It makes sense to want to ensure things are done right. That must feel like a lot to carry.”

Explore Underlying Fears: Help him identify what’s driving his need for control. “What’s at stake for you if things don’t go as planned? What would feel different if you trusted your team more?”

Introduce Incremental Trust-Building: Encourage small steps toward delegation. “What’s one task you could hand off this week, just as a trial? How would it feel to start there?”


Scenario 3: Rachel tends to shut down in meetings when feedback is given, becoming quiet and withdrawn for the rest of the day.

Answer: Trauma Response.

Explanation: Rachel’s reaction to feedback might stem from previous experiences where criticism felt threatening or unsafe. Trauma can lead people to withdraw or “freeze” when they perceive even mild criticism, as their nervous system may respond as if they’re under threat.

How do we handle it?

Recognize the Emotional Impact: Show empathy for how feedback affects her. “It seems like receiving feedback feels overwhelming at times. That’s completely okay to feel.”

Reframe Feedback: Help her see it as an opportunity for growth rather than judgment. “What if feedback could be seen as support to help you improve, not criticism?”

Coach on Resilience: Provide tools to manage her emotional response. “When feedback feels tough, how do you usually process it? What strategies could help you feel more grounded?”

Empower Through Reflection: Encourage her to reflect on past successes with feedback. “Can you think of a time when feedback helped you grow? How could that perspective help here?”

The key principles of trauma-informed coaching include:

  • Safety: Ensure the client feels emotionally safe and understood.
  • Empathy: Validate their feelings and experiences without rushing to solutions.
  • Pacing: Work at the client’s comfort level, encouraging small, manageable steps.
  • Empowerment: Frame challenges as opportunities for self-discovery and growth.

These approaches create a supportive environment where clients can process, reflect, and begin shifting their behaviors over time.

There’s plenty more to explore and lean into, but this is a good start. If you want to become a certified trauma-informed coach, check out our program. We start Dec. 4.