Happiness is a 5:1 ratio
So I read old psychology articles for fun (so you don’t have to).
Partly because I’m obsessed with the chemistry of the mind and how it affects human behavior. But also because my own brain is addicted to making seemingly random connections between innate – and often outdated – survival mechanisms and how we need to overcome them in order to live on our terms.
Enter an article in Psychology Today, dated 13 years ago and still every bit as relevant. Because, you know, SCIENCE.
Turns out, we’re programmed to have a greater sensitive to the unpleasant.
Experts surmise it’s yet another way nature built us to live longer: “our survival depended on our skill at dodging danger. The brain developed systems that would make it unavoidable for us not to notice danger and thus, hopefully, respond to it.”
How does that affect us now?
If you were bullied, you’ll be hard-pressed to forget it.
Loss of the family pet? Heartache that stays.
Bad breakup? Car accident? Got fired? Serious mood killers and powerful memories.
Our brains are simply more sensitive to the negative. People who study this shit say a greater surge in electrical activity shows up in our heads when we hear bad news or when something unpleasant happens.
Why should you care?
If you’ve been here more than five minutes, you know I’m a die-hard Law of Attraction chick. I believe the way you think creates your world. As Mike Dooley says, “Thoughts become things.”
Go for the positive, spin negative thoughts 180 degrees, and watch your fucking life transform to exactly what you want. Seek the good and you’ll get more of it.
For example, if you make $1M this year, are you going to cry over the tax bill or celebrate earning a colossal wad of cash?
If you chose celebrate, you’re thinking positive. If you’re obsessing over the tax bill, you’re stuck in the part of your brain dedicated to survival by being hyper-aware of danger.
Ah, but SCIENCE has the answer to this as well. We can ditch the negativity with a precise ratio of positivity. Five good things outweighs every one negative, experts say.
So for every perceived “bad” thing or thought, muster up five good ones.
The fastest and easiest route? Gratitude. Whatever you’re thankful for will get you through every time. (Heat, food, clothes, a car, your health, your job, your business, your cat!)
The point?
Want to be happy? Want to be supported and appreciated?
Then quit making yourself unhappy.
Stop looking for conflict. Stop arguing. Stop being offended. Stop being petty.
Your brain has a bias to hone in on negative. You don’t need to help it get (or stay) there.
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Tired of negative people? Ready to surround yourself with like-minded women who support and uplift one another? Get your ass in my Inner Circle on Facebook. It’s fun. It’s FREE. It’s a freaking amazing place to hang online.
“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” – African Proverb