A Triple Threat.

People notice when you make it rain.

It’s not a bad problem, especially while you’re building your brand. People respond, asking for help being their best selves: authors, entrepreneurs and newbies. Still, I’m one woman, no matter how badass. I’ve been editing and coaching and writing and marketing. I’m raising dogs and kids. Plus, I’m a wife and friend.

And I’m fucking tired.

I cannot do it alone anymore. I brought on amazing editors many moons ago, but then my business grew more. My website launched and so did my connections.

The thing I’ve learned about business?

It’s possible to find other bitches just as bad as me.

So I have, and they’re pulling me up by my bootstraps and getting me back on track. Cool story, right? They’re going to help you, too.

I’d like to introduce you to my two new writing coaches. One you’ve met, the other you’ll be just as excited about.

Capo

You all know Capo, my spit-fire, confession-slinging blonde columnist and editor. Now, she’s going to help me coach non-fiction clients to get shit done. A dream-maker, if you will. Capo likes wearing many hats, so she’s amped up. If you’ve never met her, you haven’t been around long, so this is my welcome to you.

Capo has ghostwritten more than forty books. She’s a rule-breaking former English teacher with a love of profanity that matches mine. Need proof? She got seniors to like Hamlet just before third quarter. This girl knows how to spark a fire in your belly.

JenFace

Jennifer Blanchard is a new addition in my harem. She’s an author and writing coach, a genius in taking abstract ideas and concepts, scenarios and situations, and turning them into full-blown epic shit (aka stories). Structure, conflict and action all in one: Jennifer has coached dozens of writers from all over the world on building a story through their first draft, getting them a tweak and edit away from publishing.

Her books include Butt-In-Chair: A No-Excuses Guide For Writers Who Struggle to Get Started, Pen Name: How To Find Yours and Creative On Command: Instant Inspiration Exactly When You Need It (Oct. 2014). If those aren’t enough to prove her worth, she’s also working on her debut novel.

Jennifer has a journalism degree and twelve years of experience as a professional writer. She’s taking on my coaching clients who write fiction. Together you’ll dream up and spit out greatness.

Capo and Jennifer are both hot, smart and ready to take you on.

This doesn’t mean I won’t be around. It just means you get more sass for your money.

It means you get a 3:1 deal on women who want to help you reach your writing goals.

Say hello in the comments or ask them questions. They’re both around starting now.

Give ‘em the welcome I know you can, friends. It’s time to celebrate.

Confessions of a Dirty Blonde :: On writing through the hard sh*t

The best kind of writing is the visceral stuff, when logic and rational thinking are secondary to your guts burning. When you’ve forgotten you’re holding your breathe until you gasp for it again. If we can wrap people in our arms while we share our darkest places, we’ve made them a reader for life.

That’s not to say it’s easy to do, though, as most of us are scared to show our scars.

What you find, once you have the courage, is that unveiling your nightmares makes them real again. You have dreams about the events. Or unresolvable, emotional outbursts. And, sometimes, it’s just too much to handle, so you wonder why you even started writing down the details to begin with.

This is the place so many writers stop. When it gets too hard or too heavy. Living a healthy, safe life is something we all want to do, so cutting the writing seems the best answer.

Except writers don’t forget what they want to share.

If you’ve found yourself paralyzed by fear, there are ways to continue working through your manuscript without debilitating yourself.

First, understand that writing about all-things-sad takes longer to complete.

You’ll be emotionally drained, physically exhausted and confused by both. The best way to navigate your feelings is to write them down. But you limit the amount of time you work on anything triggering. Yes, even more than you limit your writing time on any other project.

I wrote the terrors of my life before I could write anything else. My brain needed to be decluttered. But it also took me longer than writing other content, as I forced myself to only write for fifteen minutes at a time. Twice a day, for fifteen minutes, I sat down and broke up what I needed to free myself from. If, at the end of each allotted amount of time, I wasn’t feeling triggered, then I would complete them back-to-back. But I refused to do more than thirty minutes in a day. Otherwise the nightmares were too vivid. And the anxiety made me shake while I tried to teach.

It’s not worth it to work longer and get it done faster. Respect your body and yourself, and give it time to process the raw emotion you’re writing on the page.

Instead of a critique partner, find someone who will let you vent.

Talking to a friend about the difficulties you’re feeling is practice for when you publish. You’ll be able to navigate your own emotions while processing your own story. In doing this, you’ll gain clarity and purpose in your writing. Not only are you learning how to talk through the pain, which then diminishes it, but you’re also preparing yourself for publication: making you more ready for the hard questions that follow sharing your words.

Finally, be brave enough to write about something else on the days when you need a break.

Quitting entirely is one of the worst things you can do. But if you’re feeling a physical response to the emotion being written, it’s time to allow yourself to heal again.

Ripping off Band-Aids is good in theory, but not in this situation. When I tried to force myself to continue, even on the days my fingers shuttered, I found myself stuck, feeling unable to complete anything, including daily responsibilities.

Respect yourself enough to know that taking one day off isn’t going to ruin your flow. Write about something else. Anything. Here are a few options:

  • Fuzzy bunnies
  • Why on Earth I named my chihuahua Huckleberry.
  • How Beckster and I can be friends when we are ying and yang about nearly everything except the usefulness of the word fuck.
  • Your toes.
  • Peanut butter.
  • The best picture you’ve ever taken.

Chose something non-triggering to write about, even if it’s off task. If fuzzy bunnies didn’t get you going, choose something else. Simple. A grocery list. An email. Anything.

Most importantly, you need to remember when you open yourself in your writing, is that you’ve been through worse, and you’re still standing.

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Got writing questions for Capo? Email capo@rebeccatdickson.com. Confessions of a Dirty Blonde goes out every Thursday.