Tag Archive for: RebeccaTDickson.com

Nice girls don’t heal

Nice is what’s killing you. Slowly. Quietly. Like a good girl should.

Nice is swallowing your rage until it turns to acid in your gut.

Nice is slow suicide in sensible shoes.

Nice is what makes you apologize while someone’s stabbing you in the back.

Nice is what has you tone policing your own screams.

Nice is what keeps you bringing casseroles to people who’d watch you drown.

Nice is letting people cross your boundaries because making waves isn’t polite.

Nice is trauma wearing a pretty dress and a fake smile.

Nice is a death sentence with a smile.

Nice is why you’re popping Xanax in the bathroom at work with another panic attack.

Nice is why you’re on your third autoimmune disorder, while your digestive system eats itself alive.

Nice is trauma wearing lipstick, and calling itself love.

And I’m done being nice.

Last week, a woman came to me shaking. Not crying. Not screaming. Shaking.

She’d spent so many years being nice, she forgot how to speak. Her voice was trapped under decades of “good girl” and “be kind” and “don’t make anyone uncomfortable.”

Know what happened when she finally broke? She remembered every single person who told her to be “nice” while they were destroying her. Every. Single. One.

Your shadow remembers too.

  • Every time you swallowed your rage and called it peace.
  • Every time you froze instead of fought.
  • Every time you made yourself smaller, smaller, smaller, until you almost disappeared.

That darkness you keep trying to heal? That’s not darkness. That’s your power breaking through nice’s prison walls

That anger you’re afraid of? It knows where the bodies are buried.

That bitch you keep caging? She knows how to save your life.

Nice girls end up as statistics. In hospitals with mystery illnesses.
In relationships that feel like slow murder.
In therapy groups wondering why being good didn’t protect them.

Our Shadow Integration Workshop is for women who are done dying politely. Done turning their trauma into an inspiring Facebook post. Done pretending their rage isn’t holy.

For two hours, we’re going to descend into your shadow and wake up every not-nice part of you that’s been keeping your truth company.

No spiritual bypassing. No toxic positivity. No more f*cking gold stars for making yourself digestible.

$97 gets you the pre-recorded workshop and workbook. Because this work is as messy as the truth, and you’ll need to witness it more than once.

Go here to snag your seat.

P.S. They told you “nice” keeps you safe. But nice is what’s keeping you sick, scared, small. Nice is what’s keeping you in therapy trying to heal wounds that need rage, not reflection.

P.P.S. When nice girls snap, they don’t break. They remember. Every slight. Every betrayal. Every time they chose being liked over being alive.

P.P.P.S. Your shadow isn’t dark magic. It’s every truth you buried trying to be nice. And it’s long past time to dig them all up.

Use Your Voice

Know what the difference between launching and announcing is?

Your voice.

Announcing is a Facebook or Instagram post here and there, maybe even adding a Reel or Story. It’s mentioning your offers in passing.

Launching is committing to your truth, no holds barred, using your voice everywhere you can… Because you believe what you have can actually make real change for people and the world.

Most women mention or announce. Precious few launch.

Because most women have lost contact with their true selves, the deeper core of their being, their true voice.

You may have forgotten who you really are.

That happens when you value other people’s opinions more than your own. 

It also happens when you think that in order to succeed you have to fit a mold — or be anything or anyone other than YOU.

Both ideas are bullshit. They destroy businesses. But that’s what many of us are taught as little girls.

We live complex, stressful and often VERY disconnected lives. 

  • We are bombarded by media that convinces us that buying stuff will make us happy, beautiful, successful, prestigious, even more lovable.
  • We are in an industry where so-called successes hold the same standard: Get the car, the clothes, the jet-set life, work on the beach and be beautiful all the time.
  • We are over-exposed to the lie that is perfection. 

It can make us miserable if we see that as the ideal — while our own lives don’t look anything like that. 

It promotes the idea that it’s not okay to be who we are (because we aren’t like the people we idolize).

And it becomes a never-ending game of comparison, where the finish line is continually moved just out of reach.

The good news? You don’t have to play along, dip into that trance and participate in what ultimately becomes your own destruction.

You can choose to actively pursue YOURSELF, which absolutely, unequivocally leads to success.

Meaning: You can have kids, and dirty diapers and college tuition bills, and a messy house and not feel like brushing your hair — and be wildly successful and happy.

In fact, being comfortable in your own skin, feeling no need to dress up, dress down, buy the stuff, speak a certain way, SAY ALL THE RIGHT THINGS, be on all the time, or anything else IS true success and freedom. 

The happiest and most successful people don’t care about other people accepting them, loving them, buying from them. 

Because they accept themselves. 

And they understand that as long as they are true to themselves and their voice, they can’t fail. The clients always show up.

I’ve said this multiple times before: The truth is, it’s very hard to play a role and build a business. It’s pretty exhausting. 

Because you’re always focused on what you think you need to say or do, instead of what comes naturally to you. 

This is where you get stuck — thinking you don’t know what’s right or how to do it. 

That comes from trying to figure out what you think other people want to hear. That’s manipulation. 

It’s much easier – and far more profitable – to just be yourself, check in with who you are and what you know the truth of your expertise is, and share that.

Supporting women with all of the above is my life’s work. If you need guidance from a someone who’s been successful in this industry for almost two decades, I invite you to reach out.

TODAY – July 8, 2024 – is also the last day to join Summer School, where we will work on this exact dilemma. Join us!

It’s scary to change. But nothing is more scary than staying unhappy where you are.