Tag Archive for: bullshit slayer

The Book The Wellness Industry Doesn’t Want You to Read

I’m about to say something that will piss off every gratitude journal peddler and manifestation coach:

You don’t need to feel grateful to heal.

You don’t need to be positive.

You don’t need to transcend your difficulties.

You can notice morning light is beautiful, while still struggling with depression. You can be moved by the complexity of taste, while dealing with anxiety. You can appreciate how your car engine works, while working through trauma.

This kind of wonder doesn’t gaslight your experience or demand that you minimize your pain. It simply adds dimension to your reality.

I wrote about a woman with chronic PTSD who’s drawn to watching water move – rivers, fountains, even sink faucets. She doesn’t understand why this helps. She doesn’t need to. Her nervous system knows something her conscious mind doesn’t.

There’s a man dealing with childhood trauma fascinated by how his car engine works. “It’s just mechanics,” he says. But something about witnessing complex systems functioning properly provides evidence that order is possible when his early experience taught him nothing was dependable.

These people are not forcing positivity or practicing gratitude. They’re allowing themselves to be moved by complexity and beauty that exist regardless of their personal struggles.

And that’s far from spiritual bypassing or toxic positivity. It’s practical neuroscience.

The wellness industry wants to sell you expensive practices and curated experiences. But you’re already unconsciously doing the work.

Every time you pause to notice steam rising from your cup. Every moment you’re transfixed by shifting light patterns. Every time you play that song again (you know the one). You’re giving your depleted attention systems exactly what they need.

Studies show five minutes of attention to natural beauty (which is BROADLY defined) can improve cognitive performance and reduce cortisol levels. But you don’t need five-minute practices or formal attention training. You need recognition that you’re already doing this work.

The world contains threat AND beauty.

Danger AND safety.

Pain AND pleasure.

Struggle AND wonder.

Your nervous system already knows this. The wellness industry just doesn’t want YOU to know you know it.

This is what my new book, “Already Healing,” is about. Not adding more to your plate. Not giving you practices to fail at. Just showing you the science behind what you’re already unconsciously brilliant at.

Get the book that calls bullshit on toxic positivity.

It was released quietly on Sept. 15 and, with only organic reach, it’s sitting at #42 on Amazon, last I checked.

That tells me people are craving affirmation of their inner knowing, and maybe a bit of innovation in how we evaluate our own intelligence.

Grab yours for $3.33.

P.S. I legally changed my name to Rebecca McKinnon earlier this year. But this place remains Rebecca T.Dickson Inc.

Wednesday

Dear Diary,

Today, I did a 90-minute live training for a group I mostly don’t know. I despise video, but apparently they liked it.

Then I watched my friend and colleague, Jenna Faith, blow up the internet with her new series about the coaching industry. Go give her a follow on FB for more. It’s worth it. She’s so fucking inspiring. The world needs more people like her helping others.

I am now comfortably back in my pajamas, behind the keyboard – my most favorite place.

Things I learned today:

  • It doesn’t matter how many times you share the correct link, at the correct time, with the correct description, someone (or several people) will not be able to find it.
  • They will also try to contact you about those issues while you are actively live and teaching, and therefore unable to assist or even see their requests.
  • I LOVE my job. I love supporting women and pushing them further than they believed possible. The look on their faces when they actually do the damn thing is priceless. It is a gift of experience they will have forever.
  • If you ask for help from people who you have helped in the past, and the request is ignored or declined, they are not your people.
  •  The coaching industry may have snake oil salesmen, but there are leagues and leagues of us in integrity who DO give a shit and we are banding together like never before.
  • There are too many individuals and not enough communities.
  • We crave safe spaces, but few are brave enough or energized to create them.
  • Get off your high horse, share your vulnerability and you win. Simple.

I am 51 years old. Read: even less tolerant of bullshit than ever before, and acutely aware of my limited time on this planet. I lack the patience for wannabes, maybes and kindas.

From the bottom of my heart: Be all in when you ask for my help. Or go away.