POP QUIZ on trauma-informed coaching

Trauma-informed coaching is not just a trend—it’s a necessity in high demand.

Experts say, year over year since COVID, the need has increased 20% per 12 months with no end in sight.

That’s why I’m hosting a free workshop on Nov. 19, exploring what it means to be a trauma-informed coach. Check it out here.

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Meantime, test your knowledge with these scenarios…

1: Sarah always insists on handling things alone and refuses help, even when she’s clearly struggling with her workload. Is this a trauma response or not? If yes, how do you support your client?

2: Mark finds it hard to trust his team and feels the need to double-check everyone’s work before approving it. His attention to detail is impeccable, but he ends up working late almost every day. Trauma response or not? If yes, how do you support your client?

3: Rachel tends to shut down in meetings when feedback is given, becoming quiet and withdrawn for the rest of the day. Her colleagues assume she’s just not interested in participating. What do you think—trauma response or not? If yes, how do you support your client?

Here are the answers:

Scenario 1: Sarah always insists on handling things alone and refuses help, even when she’s clearly struggling with her workload.

Answer: Trauma Response.

Explanation: Sarah’s insistence on doing everything alone may be rooted in a survival response from past experiences where she couldn’t rely on others. Trauma can lead people to develop a “hyper-independence” as a way to feel safe, often arising from situations where they had to depend only on themselves.

How do we handle it?

Acknowledge and Validate: Start by recognizing her perspective without judgment. “It sounds like handling things on your own feels important to you. That makes sense if it’s worked for you in the past.”

Gently Explore the Root Cause: Ask questions to help her reflect on why she prefers working alone. “Have there been times when relying on others didn’t feel safe or didn’t work out as you hoped?”

Reframe Support: Position help as a tool for achieving her goals, not a weakness. “What if accepting support could give you more time or energy for the parts of your work you enjoy most?”

Scenario 2: Mark finds it hard to trust his team and feels the need to double-check everyone’s work before approving it.

Answer: Trauma Response.

Explanation: Mark’s behavior suggests a need for control, often a response to past experiences where things felt chaotic or unpredictable. Trauma can make people feel safer when they control every detail, and lack of trust in others’ work could be a way of managing underlying anxiety.

How do we handle it?

Scenario 2: Mark finds it hard to trust his team and feels the need to double-check everyone’s work before approving it.

Create a Safe Space: Reassure him that his feelings are valid. “It makes sense to want to ensure things are done right. That must feel like a lot to carry.”

Explore Underlying Fears: Help him identify what’s driving his need for control. “What’s at stake for you if things don’t go as planned? What would feel different if you trusted your team more?”

Introduce Incremental Trust-Building: Encourage small steps toward delegation. “What’s one task you could hand off this week, just as a trial? How would it feel to start there?”

Scenario 3: Rachel tends to shut down in meetings when feedback is given, becoming quiet and withdrawn for the rest of the day.

Answer: Trauma Response.

Explanation: Rachel’s reaction to feedback might stem from previous experiences where criticism felt threatening or unsafe. Trauma can lead people to withdraw or “freeze” when they perceive even mild criticism, as their nervous system may respond as if they’re under threat.

How do we handle it?

Recognize the Emotional Impact: Show empathy for how feedback affects her. “It seems like receiving feedback feels overwhelming at times. That’s completely okay to feel.”

Reframe Feedback: Help her see it as an opportunity for growth rather than judgment. “What if feedback could be seen as support to help you improve, not criticism?”

Coach on Resilience: Provide tools to manage her emotional response. “When feedback feels tough, how do you usually process it? What strategies could help you feel more grounded?”

Empower Through Reflection: Encourage her to reflect on past successes with feedback. “Can you think of a time when feedback helped you grow? How could that perspective help here?”

The key principles of trauma-informed coaching include:

  • Safety: Ensure the client feels emotionally safe and understood.
  • Empathy: Validate their feelings and experiences without rushing to solutions.
  • Pacing: Work at the client’s comfort level, encouraging small, manageable steps.
  • Empowerment: Frame challenges as opportunities for self-discovery and growth.

These approaches create a supportive environment where clients can process, reflect, and begin shifting their behaviors over time.

There’s plenty more to explore and lean into, but this is a good start. If you want to become a certified trauma-informed coach, check out our program. We start Dec. 4.

You decide your income (not your numbers)

I learned a long time ago that numbers (website hits, online followers, likes, comments and email subscribers) are such a teeny-tiny part of what determines my earning potential that I never look at them.

And on the rare occasion that I do look, I don’t really care what they are.

The way I see it…

Income and impact are completely and totally unlimited. Meaning, nothing will determine how much you make or how many people you help except YOUR BELIEF and your action.

I have about a million examples of this in my own life. For the sake of brevity, I’ll give you one:

My first launch, many moons ago, I hired the marketing team and the FB ads experts and opened a Facebook group and did all the things.

I had no idea what typical sales percentages were, how many people bought from a big launch, etc. And I liked it that way.

I knew what I wanted to make and I knew I would show up powerfully for whoever joined.

So I did the thing.

For 6 weeks, I showed up and gave it my all. I let the ads people monitor costs per click and the marketing people deal with ad copy. My only job was to stay aligned to my goal and help people.

When we closed the launch, I made $500K profit. Not bad for my very first launch. I was stoked.

But then the team sat me down and said something that I will never forget…

“You don’t understand, Becky. The sales rate for your industry is only about 2.5%. You just closed 18%. How did you do that?”

My answer then is the same as it is now.

Numbers, industry standards, averages and formulas don’t mean shit.

The only metric I care about is my level of belief in myself and my work, and my commitment to showing up to help people.

You get what you expect.

And then I told them to never again share their numbers with me – because I don’t want to know what a “typical” launch looks like. That’s none of my business.

In fact, the less I know about foolish rules or typical outcomes, the better off I am. I don’t want that shit in my head, limiting my ability.

I decide my results. Period.

Now listen, that launch made me a fuck ton of money. And it brought in 250 new souls to my business. It was magical.

But what I remember most about it was that I didn’t know the fucking rules, which meant I didn’t have to follow them.

The same thing has applied to my ENTIRE career.

When I was a 35 year old agoraphobic with two small kids, piecing together a blog and eventually a website, I had no idea what the fuck I was doing.

Then I sat my ass in front of my computer and wrote on that blog every day, connecting with people all over the world, eventually growing a writing coach business.

I googled things. I watched YouTube videos. I played with Twitter to get traffic.

I had a feeling that maybe – just maybe – I was doing something that was going to help a whole lot of people.

I did it myself.

A lot of times, it was the hard way.

But I always did it before I was ready, before I had any clue what the “rules” or expectations were, before I had too much time to think about it.

(Irony: My blog was called “ThinkingTooHard,” a practice that made me anxious AF, before I bought the domain rebeccatdickson.com and opened up the biz.)

The point is I did the shit. I did it scared. I did it uncertain.

But I DID IT.

I use the same domain name today – but with an awesome design and great photos because I can now afford to pay the pros for that stuff.

This isn’t about who builds your website. This is about doing things when you’re scared… Even if you don’t know what may happen, or you’re not sure why you feel pulled to run this damn business at all.

It’s also about letting things add up.

Over 16 years, I have no earthly clue how many followers I have across social media, how many email subscribers, or how many website hits.

But I do know this: They only add up if I keep going. And they add up faster the further I go, too.

  • Things that took five years now take one year.
  • Things that took one year now take one month.
  • Things that used to take me a month, I can now do in a day.

Start before you’re ready and watch it add up.

Or sit around thinking about it some more and multiple it by zero. (Which gets you more zeros, for those who struggle with math.)

Your next wild idea that makes no sense and freaks you out?

The program that keeps pulling you to create, and scares the shit out of you?

The new niche? The new income goal? The new partnership?

MOVE.

You will figure it out as you go.

This is what we free spirits do. We follow our REALLY BIG hearts. We trust our purpose. We lean the fuck in when others are too afraid to trust themselves.

And then we make magic.

You really can do this.

Here’s the deal:

I believe I was put on this planet to help women who want to help others make a difference (and make money).

The world is full of incredible, gifted women who want to make a difference in the world. Some of them feel guilty for wanting what they want or are confused about how to get it.

They often have a hard time believing in themselves and their work.

They feel stuck around how to start, how to attract clients, sell offers, earn what they deserve, and run a REAL business.

It’s my job to help you with all of that.

There is nothing wrong with you for being over your mediocre results.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to make a massive impact, and earn an income to match.

One of the things that is different about me and my work is that I understand the practical and the energetic.

I understand the internal work of healing the past, removing limiting beliefs, clearing space for what you want most and taking the right actions.

I know how to guide you through all of that.

I’m not your average business woman.

Need help? Reach out. You can get me directly via becky(at)rebeccatdickson(dot)com.